More Carside To Go

This is a sequel post to 2 other posts. See if you can figure out which ones. First correct answer wins nothing.

I went up to the Great North a little early to hang out with the animals and see how many different allergy pills I could take in a single day without having some sort of synergistic effect that knocked me unconscious (the current record is 3: CVS Generic, Claritin and Zyrtec). I was also tasked with the picking of the dinner. Since I don't really know any of the places around there, and I didn't want to put much effort into it, I went with Applebee's because I thought it would be easiest for Kathryn to pick up on the way home, as she has to pass it.

Even though my version of the menu was given to me within 2 hours of placing my order, I somehow did not have an up-to-date copy. This resulted in my original order not actually being on the "real" menu and also in me feeling incredibly foolish for not having a backup plan. I just went with an easy standby. A cheeseburger! The Fire Pit Bacon Burger to be more specific. And it was good, even as takeout. I was pretty surprised. I think that place may have to be visited more frequently. Especially if they actually make the Fire Pit a little spicier.

After the burger I enjoyed a nice Winter Warmer and then fell asleep covered in pug and cats while watching the Celtics stage an impressive comeback over the Pacers. That is a good night.

-Jon

This is Becoming a Habit

Ok, so apparently I was not done with my Christmas shopping after all. Maybe next time I should check my list a little more closely. Maybe even check it twice! Wow, that was bad.

Back to the mall to finish up a couple last minute things. Of course, I am not able to divulge the gifts in case anyone actually reads this thing, but suffice it to say that as long as Mom's gift arrives in the next 2 days, I am all set. Also, it turns out that ordering something on December 11th still might not be early enough for it to arrive by Christmas. Hopefully next year I will come back and read this and do all my online shopping on Thanksgiving. Good thing I'm writing it down.

Since I am pretty much opposed to all other fast food, going to the mall offers me the chance to eat at the one passable restaurant: Wendy's. I ordered exactly the same thing as last time, but this time I actually made an effort to remember the name of the meal. Which I then forgot. I am an embarrassment to burger-blog-writers everywhere.

I am pleased that while the burger was literally exactly the same as last time, the fries were slightly less salty. Still far too salty, but at least semi-enjoyable. No Frosty this time though. Maybe that's a sign that I am growing up.

In other news, watch the posts for a new link. Tired of reading about burgers? Looking for under-researched and over-opinionated writing with far too many dependent clauses and an excessive use of parentheses? Want me to stop asking rhetorical questions? Stay tuned. . .

-Jon

One of Them Was Slightly Better

Days where 2 of the meals are cheeseburgers are generally good days. Today was no exception to this rule.

The first burger was Wendy's for lunch after a hard day of Christmas shopping. It actually was quite hard because of back pain from shoveling the day before. Kathryn and I utilized many a Holyoke Mall bench for frequent breaks, which I have to assume added about half an hour to our trip. Also, what is the deal with the Borders at that mall? It's nearly impossible to find what you are looking for if you are looking for a specific book.

I went with the. . . I don't know, whatever they replaced the Big Bacon Classic with. It's the exact same thing. And still delicious. And the Frosty (not Joe, the milkshake thing) is always a nice replacement for a soda. Too bad they went a little overboard with the salt on my French fries. I still ate them all though, because I am a champion.

Later, dinner ended up being cheeseburgers again! This time they were grilled in foolish sub-freezing temperatures over at Dad and Kelly's. Two of us had burgers, and two of us had charcoal briquets. Apparently these silly ladies think that well done is an appropriate way to cook a piece of meat. I shed a tear.

In an unrelated side (dish) note, we had tortellini salad along with the burgers. I would estimate that I ate about a pound. That is good stuff.

-Jon

9 Year Reunion

Obviously we'll have to try this again at Christmas after so many people decided not to be around, but the mini-reunion was still a fun time. Mostly spent making fun of pretty much everything. Especially New Jersey. Did you realize that simply living in New Jersey makes you less friendly? Ask Kim for more details.

We went to Ruby Tuesday this year, which seems to be less appealing than Uno's since far fewer people showed up. We ended up with a pair of (former) Sagans, a pair of Steves, Helder and myself. Then we proceeded to mock the vast majority of Facebook posts than people make. We also found out that Helder pretty much remembers nobody from high school, which will make the official reunion next year incredibly hilarious.

I would say that the highlight of the meal was when Steve ordered the Turkey Sliders, then commented after the waitress left that "I never had a turkey burger, I was just under a lot of pressure. It was the first thing I saw." I think he was distracted by the salad bar.

As for myself, I went with the Triple Prime Bacon Cheddar Burger (insert lame math joke about primes). No mayo. I believe my statement was "If there's mayo, so help me. . ." but no actual threat so that I wouldn't be asked to leave the restaurant. And there was no mayo. Clearly the key is to make sure that you make a ridiculous comment after asking for no mayo to make sure that it gets remembered. Good to know for future reference, until my plan to keep mayo off all burgers is enacted. If only I had my own restaurant.

-Jon

Much As I Expected

Although last night failed to deliver a burger (because we had gigantic burritos instead), today there was no question about what lunch would be. We bravely adventured the whole 200 yards through rain and puddles to make it over to R.F. O'Sullivan for a delicious meal.

After last night's crazy Carnival party (which involved rocking out pretty hardcore to I'm On a Boat and dominating some fools in Beirut/Pong), we had all intentions of having breakfast but instead decided to just wait until a more appropriate lunch time. Not that I wouldn't eat a burger for breakfast, as evidenced by a previous tale. Catherine showed up sometime around 11 I think and had to wait until Erica's roommate Jess could make it over on the T. She got lost. This cost us valuable eating time, but luckily Guitar Hero was able to hold us over until she got reoriented.

Good thing the Blackjack burger is so amazingly fantastic, because that was the worst Newcastle I have ever had. I think the 08 that I found on the bottle was probably the date it was good until, because I was highly disappointed in that beer. The burger itself was still as great as I remember, so the meal itself was a good time. Except that Jess ruined her burger by ordering it well done. What is wrong with people?

-Jon

The Ultimate Burger

Nope, I am not saying it is the winner of the Best Burger Ever. That was actually what it was called. Sorry for the deception.

Dinner was at a place in Turners Falls called Cafe Martin (I think I am missing some accent marks there, because there was a lot of French stuff on the walls). It it one of Kathryn's favorite places, and since I have no idea about anything that far north, she was obviously going to be the one making the decision. I felt slightly bad ordering a burger when there were so many fancy things on the menu, but I have a reputation to uphold.

We also started off with bruschetta, which was so ridiculously huge that I almost regretted the decision. At least until I ate it, because it was great. It also prevented Kathryn from having any chance of finishing her dinner. I, however, dominated the Ultimate Burger with surprising authority. I didn't finish my potatoes though. . .

The burger itself was another take on what apparently is my favorite. Sauteed onions, sauteed mushrooms, bacon and gorgonzola. I also put a couple tomatoes on there, even though they had no business with those other ingredients. But hey, tomatoes are delicious. And the whole thing was 8 oz (probably pre-cooked weight; why don't they just put the post-cooked weight? It's a mystery). And they cooked it right, which is highly pleasing. If I ever find myself almost in Vermont again, I will be stopping there for another one. Or maybe a filet mignon. Ooh! A burger made of filet mignon. Wait, that's probably going too far.

-Jon

November is Grilling Weather

So October was a little slow for eating burgers, but November is off to a quick start. Thursday night was another trip to Dad and Kelly's, and burgers were on the menu. There were also fancy French fries. I am not exactly sure what they were, but there was definitely some sort of garlic seasoning going on there. They were also really hot when they came out of the oven, which I experienced firsthand.

The sad part of the story is that of the 3 burgers that were not well done, Dad and I got the ones that were the most done, and Zannah got the rarest one. That is really unfair. She's a dog! Ours were only slightly past medium rare though, so nothing too serious.

We'll see if grilling continues once the snow starts. That's the real test.

-Jon

I Need a Mint

Today's burger was surprising in that the original plan was actually to go get breakfast. Unfortunately, the brunch buffet at The Station is apparently only available on Sundays. Oops. Also, the line at Sylvester's was like 45 minutes long, and there was no way that we intended to wait that long. There were so many people that it took Kathryn 3 minutes to get our names OFF the list. That is just wacky.

Eventually we ended up at Fitz Willy's because Kathryn and I knew it was good and Melissa had never been. This resulted in my food plans going from brunch to a burger. Namely, the French Onion burger. Not sure what exactly made it French, since it had Swiss cheese, but I am not in the burger-naming business (although I may look into it). There were sauteed onions, onions straws and a slice of red onion on this thing. I can only imagine what that did to my breath.

Sadly, the burger did not live up to the high expectations I had for it. First, it was overdone slightly. Nothing is worse for a burger than overcooking it. Second, we had the most ridiculously fantastic appetizer of all time: gorgonzola garlic bread. There was pretty much nothing that was going to live up to that thing. Fries were good though.

Next time I am going to follow my instincts and get a different burger. Or, just make it clear that I don't mean medium well when I say medium rare.

-Jon

That's a Lot of Possibilities

This post is long overdue, but since I am lazy all I have to say is "tough luck."

Also, it contains math.

At some point in the last 2 weeks (I believe it was a Sunday), we had burger night at Mom & Chuck's before the bros headed back to Boston. I am not sure what the original plan was, but somehow it exploded into so many burger options that it would take months to try them all. The various options included: onions in the burger, blue cheese in the burger, blue cheese on the burger, American cheese on the burger, pepper jack cheese on the burger, sauteed onions and sauteed mushrooms. I also prepped some red onions with olive oil and grilled those up. Admittedly, we may have gone a bit overboard on the onions, but to be fair, onions are delicious. And there was the option of a toasted bun, which is just a classy choice. Offhand, I think this ends up with 256 burger options based on the way I am doing the calculations. That's a lot of burgers.

After loading up with both sauteed. . . vegetables (not sure if onions or mushrooms count in that department), I decided on the grilled onion and American cheese option with onions and blue cheese inside the burger. This resulted in a burger that was about 2.5 inches tall. Also, there were two of them. I am fairly certain that was enough food to last me through the next day. But it was delicious, and I would eat another one right now if I wasn't full of pizza.

Oh yeah, the French fries were also fantastic. No such luck with the ketchup though. Really, why does any company besides Heinz even bother making ketchup?

-Jon

PS - If Kathryn says anything, this has been up for days.

Oops

Yes, I did eat some burgers the other night. No, I haven't written about it yet. Don't worry, I will take care of it this weekend. And hopefully eat another burger as well.

-Jon

Two Burgers > One Burger

After a long layoff (by my standards) from burgers, it looks like they are making a dietary comeback. I am not sure if this will keep up, since the weather is going to become less and less grill-friendly, but we'll enjoy it while it lasts.

No major stories to tell, but we have reaffirmed that burgers are much better when you add sauteed onions and sauteed mushrooms to them. I also believe that Matt and Bill would agree with this assertion. Also undeniable: eating 2 burgers is more awesome than eating 1 burger.*

I wonder if burgers will be on the menu at Mom & Chuck's wedding next weekend. . .

I also wonder if people will be annoyed that they were expecting a super-awesome story and instead got this. Sorry!

-Jon

*This does not apply to R.F. O'Sullivan, where eating 2 burgers will almost certainly kill you from beef poisoning. It's like alcohol poisoning for meat.

Yes, I Know They Feed You at Weddings. . .

But that still didn't stop me from eating "dinner" a few hours beforehand. I met up with Amy and Scott at the hotel around 3 or so. Luckily for us, we found out that the wedding we were there for was at 5:30, which was good since none of us had any idea about the time as of the morning of the event. As a side note, this story doubles as a strong motivator for paying more attention to where I put wedding invitations in the future.

Since the wedding was at 5:30, we figured dinner wouldn't be until somewhere around 9, and that is far too late. We went over to T.G.I. Friday's because it was the closest restaurant that we could see from the hotel.

The winning menu choice: the Jack Daniels burger. Burgers with alcohol or beer-based sauces seem to be the new big thing these days. I would say that this is because they are fantastic. Especially if you order them rare and they actually come that way. Know who could learn something about rare burgers? Uno's. Sometimes there, rare is interpreted as well done, and that is just a terrible thing to do to a burger. This story is kind of rambling.

As for the wedding, it was a good time. Congrats to Scott and Courtney (a different Scott from the previously mentioned one).

-Jon

PS - I wrote this whole post while watching the TV, so anything spelled wrong or anything that makes no sense at all is because of that.

Open House is Scary

Thursdays are exciting days because they are the days that I eat dinner with Dad and Kelly, and it's always a surprise what dinner is going to be. This particular Thursday was also Open House at work, which meant that after whatever surprise meal I ate, there was a minor chance that it would later be vomited up due to massive nervousness in front of a bunch of parents. Boy, that would make a great story.

It didn't happen though.

Dinner was bacon cheeseburgers, which is always a great addition to cheeseburgers. Also some baked beans were involved, and they also contained bacon. Really, bacon is a great addition to everything. Maybe I could make a blog about that. . .

Just kidding; I can barely keep this one updated. And I eat much more bacon than I eat cheeseburgers.

Open House also went smoothly. At least it did from my perspective. Who knows what those poor parents were thinking. If I had to guess, I would say that some of the thoughts were "why does he keep looking at the side wall there?" or possibly "wow, [their kid's name] was right about this guy. He's crazy."

Oh well, there's always next year to try to do it correctly.

-Jon

PS - Is anyone else as baffled by the fact that I don't have a tag for bacon as I am?

PPS - Why is each post's font size different? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills here!!!

That Was a Wet Evening

Never one to turn down a gift, I gladly accepted Chuck's offer of a pair of Red Sox tickets that he couldn't use. Kathryn was also more than willing to take a free game. Unfortunately, the weather was quite threatening as we headed down the Mass Pike, so we had some concerns about how much use we would get out of them.

We decided to forego the bus because if there was a major rain delay, the bus would not be leaving until the game was officially called. Instead, we decided to drive to Somerville first and have a burger with Alex and Erica. At this point, there was not really much rain, but the signs of future rain were apparent.

The four of us headed over to R.F. O'Sullivan, and, surprisingly, were able to immediately get a table. It looks like 5:30 on Saturday is not a busy time. Since I went for the Black & Blue Burger last time (see previous post I believe), it was time to go back to the Blackjack Burger. Good choice. It was equally delicious as previous editions of said burger. Plus this is one of the few places that will give you a rare burger. I know I have said that before, but I think it's important to bring up every time. Maybe other places could learn a thing or two from my eloquent words.

Possibly even more impressive than the burger was the fact that Kathryn finished her entire burger. These things are roughly the size of her normal sized head. And thus about half the size of my oversized melon.

After the burger, we walked down to the T-Station and headed for Fenway. Once we arrived at Kenmore, we were a little concerned because it was already 7:30 and, as it was not raining, we thought we had missed a few innings.

Boy were we wrong. Not only did we not miss anything, but the game didn't start until 9:14. A slightly more than 2-hour delay during which it rained for a total of 7 minutes. Seven minutes!!! At least the grounds crew kept things interesting by continually fooling around with the tarp and making the entire crowd think the game was about to start. Let's put it this way. During a real rain-delay at Fenway, the entire front section of the stadium is empty. During this delay, every person was still in their seats. So ridiculous.

By the time the 5th inning ended, the Sox were up by a ton and it was starting to rain again. We decided (along with about 13,981 other people) that it was time to go and took the T back to Porter Square. Of course, by this point it had stopped raining again, and we decided to walk instead of calling Alex for a ride.

Big mistake.

We made it about halfway before the sky opened up on us. By the time we got to Alex's apartment, it looked like I had just gotten out of the shower.

But the Sox won, and I did get a burger. I am still calling the night a win.

-Jon

A Marathon Burger Day, or Burgers for Breakfast

After a depressingly long hiatus from rounded meat patties, today I ended up eating nothing but cheeseburgers. And side dishes that go along with cheeseburgers. And maybe a cookie too. It was a good day.

I picked up Bill at Logan after his trip to California since apparently no one else was able to do it. This was slightly after 10:00am. As we were navigating Logan's treacherous road system (which I believe was designed by a guy who was inspired by the web of a drunk spider), he suggested that we could get burgers at RF O'Sullivan since we were sort of close to it. I gave them a call and found out they opened at 11, so that was good news. I was also shocked to find that I was able to get there from the eastern side of Cambridge, since that meant I needed exit 20 instead of exit 18, even though I was going to the same place. I put that little tale in there because someone else has got to find that strange.

It turns out that 11am is a good time to beat the rush, since we were the first people there. Surprisingly, another group of people came in as well. That's how good the burgers are. I had the Black & Blue burger again, and it was super again. My only issue with it is that they use bleu cheese dressing and put it on last, which meant that by the end of the meal I had bleu cheese hands.

Also, their pickles aren't great.

Fast forward to dinner, and it was burgers again! Mostly because Chuck was bribing me, Bill, Kathryn, Mia, Nate and Mia's roommate Sarah Beth with burgers in exchange with assistance in addressing wedding invitations. The burgers of the night, at least for me, were made with both bleu cheese and American (melted over the crumbled bleu cheese to keep it from escaping), mushrooms and sauteed onions. Then we got wild for the 2nd burger and actually put the bleu cheese inside. That was an even better method to prevent premature bleu cheese jail breaks.

I have a strong suspicion that today will be far less burger-filled.

-Jon