A Nice Friday Lunch

Northampton really needs more parking. That garage is just not getting the job done.

Matt, Bill and I went out for lunch at the Northampton Brewery, and got a sweet table out in the beer garden after some old guy told us we shouldn't bother waiting and should go inside instead. Hey, old guy, I'm pretty sure you are not a brewery employee, so mind your business. Also, we ignored him because we could very clearly see a table for 4 people that was unoccupied. Maybe that old guy and his stupid party of 6 needs to go inside, but for awesome people like us, that table will do nicely.

We ordered some tasty beverages, and got down to the difficult task of narrowing down the many choices to a single meal. We also decided that we needed an appetizer of soft pretzels, by which I mean I decided this due to the intense deliciousness of their cheesy beer sauce. You can see the tattered remains of this sauce in the little blue bowl in the picture below. By the end of my fries, that bowl was pretty much clean enough to return to the shelf.

I decided on the Green Mountain Burger, which I ignored during my first pass of the menu because, for no reason at all, I had come to the (incorrect) conclusion that said burger was a veggie burger. This was not the case, as it not only was a beef burger, it also came with delicious bacon. Also, some Vermont cheddar cheese and mushrooms, but most importantly bacon. Check this behemoth out.

To make it even more delicious, Matt donated his tomato to my meal, as he is a weirdo like Melissa and doesn't like tomato. It's truly baffling.

This burger was great! I ordered it medium rare, and it actually arrived as such. You might not think that this is a big deal, but if you've been reading this blog since the beginning then you'll know how little patience I have for overdone burgers. I want them pink and juicy, dammit! And this one was definitely that. I also made myself some of my (patent not pending) Tabasco ketchup for the fries that didn't make it into the cheddar sauce. All in all, a very nice meal.

-Jon

Holy Crap! I Actually Order a Burger

Has it really been 3 months since I last got a burger? Apparently so.

Melissa wanted to go out to lunch after being away in Japan for like a bunch of days, but she had the requirement that we did not go to an Asian place or a seafood place. Since this ruined my plan of going to Sakura (an Asian seafood restaurant, which I only suggested as a way to bust chops), we were forced to come up with a backup plan. This plan became going to Judie's, where it may actually be physically impossible to get a bad meal.

Usually I go with the Southwest-Rubbed Steak, as it is a ridiculously delicious meal that generally provides enough leftovers for a nice breakfast the next morning. However, I felt that for lunch, something smaller might be more appropriate. Like a tasty burger!

I didn't know which burger I wanted, but I finally ended up going with the Cheddar, Onion & Bacon Burger. I figured that all three of those ingredients are good, so combining them together must theoretically also be good. This was a large burger with a lot of onions. That's a good thing.

The combination of cheddar and onions (which I believe may have been consumed before in another form at another burger joint) is a good one, and bacon makes pretty much everything better. My only complaint is that the whole thing could use like one more flavor, even if it's just a little bit of salt and pepper on the meat before it hits the grill. There was just something missing. I still ate the whole thing since it was cooked nicely and was juicy.

On the plus side, those wacky potato things are delightful, and our appetizer of some kind of crazy cheese-covered bruschetta really hit the spot.

-Jon

I'm Very Sorry

I have been very bad at keeping this updated, but luckily I've only had 3 burgers since the last post. Since Chris actually has been keeping the hits rolling in on this site, I feel obligated to make a new attempt at telling my delicious burger stories. Here are the 3 I missed, although some of the details may be lacking.

First up is a delicious burger from the day after the giant snowstorm when most of the power was out. Along with the phones, which was even more annoying. Since Bill had no power, and had no way to contact me, he drove up here optimistically thinking that he might be able to watch football up here. Unfortunately, that was not the case, but we were able to finally find a place that had food available. This was very convenient, since my power had been out since 2am, and that meant that everything perishable in the refrigerator had perished.

Brick Wall Burger was serving a limited menu (burgers, fries, cole slaw), but that was just fine with us. I can't remember exactly what I went with, but it clearly contained pepperjack cheese, tomato and red onion. So I guess I do remember it, just not the sauce I chose. These burgers are no joke.

That's Bill's red sweatshirt in the background. You may be wondering why there is only one burger on the table. Funny story... true story... Bill ordered the same burger as I did, but since all the ordering and receipts were being done by hand, there was a mixup between the girl who took our orders and the guy who cooked the food, resulting in only one burger showing up at first. That was quickly rectified, and we both got to enjoy a delicious meal. Sadly, I forgot to order the right kind of cole slaw, so mine just sat there being gross instead of getting eaten.

A couple of weeks later, Bill was working in Adams or North Adams (who cares, it's Berkshire County), so he came over here when he was done with his cheese shenanigans and requested another trip to BWB. Since Kate and I aren't too picky about where we go, that was just fine with us.

This time I remembered to get the spicy slaw, which has some kind of spicy dressing on it instead of mayonnaise, which is gross. I believe that has been addressed before. I also mixed things up by going with BBQ sauce and bacon along with a changeup in the cheese department (it appears to be American cheese).

I didn't get any fries this time, since Kate was getting fries and she never finishes hers. I'd rather steal fries than let them go to waste. Both of these burgers were quite tasty, although the second one was cooked a little bit more than it needed to be. It also didn't get the benefit of the doubt by being potentially the only thing I was going to be eating that day.

We'll wrap things up by heading around the corner to The People's Pint. I don't mean that in a literal sense though, because it would have been weird to leave one restaurant after a filling meal and sit down for another. This happened about 3 weeks after the last story.

Kate and I went out for a dinner because we had been a bit lax in our grocery shopping and both of us were feeling a little lazy. We both ended up choosing The Squealer for our meal, which is a burger made with ground beef and ground bacon. The picture kind of sucks because the People's Pint is super dark and my phone's camera is from a world where making a camera without a flash is acceptable. Stupid Apple...

I was expecting this burger to be more delicious because of the bacon, but I couldn't really taste the bacony goodness. They also don't put tomato on their burgers, which makes me sad. Get some damn tomatoes!! Who's running this restaurant, Melissa? Ridiculous. Also it was overcooked, which reduced its juiciness. Never dry out a burger. Don't do it. On a completely different note, I tried a new beer during this meal, and I believe you can see the snifter in the top left of the photo.

Hopefully this will mark a return to the days of more timely burger posts. I will have to make a better effort to write the posts closer to the actual burger eating. We'll see what we can for for 2012.

-Jon

Now This Was a Burger

After the atrocity that presented itself as my last burger, there was little doubt that a burger was going to be my meal of choice when we went to Amherst Brewing Company. But there were a whole bunch of choices, so I wasn't sure which one to go with. I finally settled on the Classic Burger, Cajun Style. We also got some huge ass nachos (with chili) and some stuffed mushrooms.

Between Melissa, Bill, Kathryn and myself, we got a bison burger, a normal burger, a turkey burger, and pulled pork. Consume all the animals!! I think that's Melissa's burger in the background below as a matter of fact. I bet mine was better.

The Cajun burger was covered with Cajun spices (I have had Cajun spices on multiple occasions, but I still don't know what they are exactly), and then topped with blue cheese and bacon along with some tomato and onion. It was a fairly formidable looking meal.

It also came with some Brewhouse fries and a little pickle. This burger was fantastic! I would rank it up in the tiers with an R.F. O'Sullivan burger, which it was actually very similar to (the Black & Bleu Burger).

If you are ever in Amherst, you should make a trip over to the new and improved ABC. All our food was delicious, and they have several beers (both their own and "guest" beers) of highly drinkable natures. It's win-win!

-Jon

So, Moving Kind of Sucks

I don't dislike the idea of moving. I hate the actual process of having to pack things, transport them, and then unpack them. At this point I am mostly moved. Although I suppose if you look at both my old residence and new residence you might decide that I am not actually moved, but rather am living in 2 places at once. And that's valid. It turns out that I have an awful lot of stuff.

At any rate, I was back in Ludlow on Tuesday in an attempt to transport more of my things, specifically the kitchen related ones. And a load of laundry. It's always good to have clean clothes. I also got a chance to stop by Dad and Kelly's for dinner, which just happened to be cheeseburgers!

I don't know if there was a sale on grinder rolls or if there was a shortage of hamburger rolls, but either way, we had the burgers cut in half on grinder rolls. It was kind of cool, and it was actually easier to eat them without the burger trying to slide out the back of the bun. Kelly might be on to something there.

I am supposed to be going to Boston this weekend, so perhaps more burger-related shenanigans will soon follow.

-Jon

Nothing Too Fancy

I feel like I've written this post before. So I'll keep it short and sweet. And I'm going to be lazy and combine 2 different burger events into a single post.

Burger #1 was a bacon cheeseburger grilled by Chuck with the bacon under the cheese in order to keep it from escaping. There were also some sauteed mushrooms and onions (as per usual) and BBQ sauce as a condiment. Throw that together with a side of baked beans and you've got yourself a good meal.

Burger #2 was one of those pre-made frozen burgers as Sam and Ashleigh's cookout. Usually those burgers are difficult to cook correctly, so the key is in the available toppings. I decided to do with avocado (for deliciousness and health purposes), ketchup (to keep things from getting dry) and that buffalo chicken dip that people make for cookouts (because I figured it would be good). Seriously, how delicious is buffalo chicken dip? Pretty delicious if you ask me, which you didn't. I would eat that as a meal, which would probably end up going badly.

Both burgers were good. Next time you're at a cookout, give the buffalo chicken dip a chance on your burger. It will be delightful!

-Jon

Happy Father's Day. . . One More Time

I apparently already have 2 posts with Happy Father's Day in the title. It would seem that burgers are now the official sponsor of this holiday.

As a special treat for Dad, Matt volunteered me to cook the burgers for Father's Day. Now, you may know that I have a special hatred for grilling because every time I try to grill something on my grill, it gets cooked unevenly, or overcooked, or undercooked (as in still raw in places). I was under the impression that this was because I was not really a man since men can grill. Turns out it was just that my grill hates performing its job.

Using Dad and Kelly's grill, I was able to pull off an amazing feat of deliciousness. My trick? Preseasoning the meat with a little garlic salt and Montreal steak seasoning, and then to stuff cheese inside the burgers. I ended up with 4 cheese combo choices: American inside and on top, American inside with provolone on top, provolone inside and on top and obviously provolone inside with American on top. Is this my best idea ever? Probably.

And with a working grill, everyone's burgers came out cooked correctly. Even Kelly's, which is impressive since she eats hers well done to the point where I figured that leaving it on the grill any longer would be a fire hazard. It was not, and she enjoyed it, somehow...

Alright grilling, it's on now! You're attempts to undermine me with a shoddy performing piece of equipment have failed! Much meat shall be eaten to atone for your crimes!

-Jon

Happy Memorial Day

Well, technically Happy Day Before Memorial Day. That just doesn't have the same ring to it though.

And what shows your patriotism better than eating a cheeseburger? Probably a lot of things, but I chose to express myself through the consumption of a pair of burgers. Actually they were twins, and will be described in all their glory momentarily.

Chris and Lindsay were around for the weekend, and Kate and the pugs were invited as well, so there was a whole lot of wackiness going on. Specifically as a result of Odin and Patches. Those two are crazy! Odin will probably be exhausted for the next 48 hours. The menu was burgers and hot dogs, along with Bill's baked beans, some pasta salad and I believe regular salad, although there wasn't nearly enough room on my plate for everything. I decided to focus on burgers and beans.

My burgers were both made with onions inside, and topped with bacon under cheddar and American cheese and served on a bun with sauteed mushrooms and onions. That is a hefty burger, and I easily could have been more than satisfied with just one of them. I decided to eat 2 though, which meant that by the end, my stomach was approximately 40% larger than its normal size and if you had poked me with anything sharp, I would have flown around the room like a cartoon. Luckily that did not happen.

That was a nice day.

-Jon

Bacon Makes Everything Better

I don't know how I forgot to write about this, but with the nice feature of being able to date posts whenever I feel like it, no one will ever know in the future that this was delayed by a few days.

Chuck had gotten some high-quality ground beef from... Arnold's maybe to make delicious burgers. I don't care what anyone says; getting fresh ground beef and making your own patties is always better than getting pre-made ones. Even those pre-made ones with all sorts of fancy things inside.

These ones came out quite delicious. And combined with the onions I sauteed, some bacon, and some raw onion slices, the burgers were so good that they didn't even need any condiments. Yup, I went for the rarely seen double-onion approach to my burger. I do not recommend that on a date, unless you are lucky enough to date someone without a working nose. Or someone who is super easygoing. Good luck with that!

-Jon

Inside the Burger?

Onions are a delicious topping for a cheeseburger, because onions are great. To make things even easier to eat, you can get the onions inside the ground beef so that they won't try to escape from the bun, as onions are frequently apt to do. They're very sneaky that way.

So obviously I told you that lovely onion info because that's what kind of burger I got to eat for dinner. Chuck also whipped up some of the now famous garlic mushrooms, along with some sauteed onions. Basically it was a heaping pile of the most aromatic foods you can get, turned into a delicious burger. It's also the last thing you should ever eat if you happen to be out on a first date. It would probably be ok after like 10 dates, because at that point you can generally stop trying to impress the other person. For the record, I stop trying on date #1. Isn't Kate lucky to have me?

That burger was quite delicious, and I think it was helped by the fact that it was accompanied by tater tots cooked to crispy perfection. And also salad, which made me feel like less of a fat slob. What a delightful meal.

-Jon

It's Because I'm Brave

Most people who have a bad food experience avoid that location like the plague, but not me. For instance, I might go right back within a month. And I'll go back again, because I'm just that kind of guy. By which I mean "stupid."

Oh well, so bet it.

We went out to dinner at Red Robin, which marks the first trip there of 2011. But probably not the last, although maybe it will be since Judie's is clearly higher rated by the family. At any rate, I obviously chose to eat a burger since it's a burger place and ordering anything else seems kind of silly. Like going to a non-classy bar and ordering wine. Or going to a regular bar and ordering wine. Knock it off, weirdo.

I decided on the A1 Peppercorn Burger because it seemed like I hadn't ever had it and also posted about it. It had some bacon, pepperjack cheese, tomatoes, onion "straws" and whatever A1 Peppercorn sauce is. I don't want to find out because it's probably something mayonnaise based and if I know there's mayo, I'll probably never be able to eat it again. And I might hold you personally responsible for ruining the fantasy world I've set up for myself in my mind. The burger didn't quite look like the picture, but it was pretty close. You can be the judge. The bun looks a little strange because it's an onion bun.

I am a fan of the onion bun. It's a different flavor, and I like it. Also the burger itself was pretty good. It was also ridiculously huge, and I foolishly consumed the entire thing. At least I was smart enough to leave some of the fries behind, so I didn't end up feeling like someone inflated my stomach like a cartoon with a helium tank. And thus far, I don't feel sick either. I'm thinking that was a one-time only event.

-Jon

The Burger Triplets

Now, eating 3 burgers sounds like a lot, but they were sliders so it's not really as much as it would originally seem. Still probably more than I needed to eat though. I will have to skip a meal tomorrow.

Chuck got a bunch of mini-burgers (aka "sliders," although I am not sure I understand the name) to grill up tonight, so I signed on for 3 of them. I think a better idea would have been to have 2 of them, especially since I also ate an absurd amount of baked beans. Obviously that part of my brain that recognizes when my stomach is full was on break for dinner tonight.

There were also mini-buns, which made me feel sort of like a giant. And we had some sweet toppings, like garlic mushrooms, sauteed onions and cheese. There was BBQ sauce too, but somehow I failed to notice it until my third burger, at which point I threw it on there anyway. When you're going overboard, you might as well go all the way. Don't half-ass it.

The burgers were good, and I learned a valuable lesson: just because they're little, don't try to eat three of them. This isn't Man vs. Food.

-Jon

Reservations?

We don't take no stinkin' reservations!! That's actually the unofficial motto of Judie's, which meant that we had to wait quite a while for a table for 8. But eventually we did get a table and a delicious burger was soon to follow. And 2 new beers!

As a side note, I did another classic Jon parking job on that street in Amherst off the main street. And by classic I mean that I was at least a foot off the curb even though I had more than enough room to park correctly. That's just how I get down. Seriously, ask anyone.

Once we finally got our table, I was torn between the burger I got last time and the Cheddar, Onion & Bacon burger. I eventually decided on the latter since it was new. Or maybe not, but definitely new to 2011, and that's good enough for me! I was also torn between 2 different beers, but that's a story for another webpage. Also, I ended up not having to choose since I got both!!

They did not skimp on the onions on this burger. It also seemed to have a lot of cheese, and the standard 2 pieces of bacon. It was kind of a train-wreck in appearance though. See?

Regardless of how it looked, it was delicious! And it was cooked just the way I wanted it, which makes my tummy happen. Those fries are also pretty ridiculous. Seems like Judie has got this burger thing down pat.

-Jon

Twice the Cheese, Twice the Fun

After what was, for me, a relatively long and exhausting day, it was exciting to find out that dinner was going to be cheeseburgers. And there were 2 choices of cheese! Since I couldn't choose between provolone and American, I decided to go with both. This turned out to be a delicious decision, and was seconded by Dad.

This time around, the grill was more cooperative than it was for the last round of burgers. Everything was grilled to burger perfection, except for Kelly's well done mess. But since that's how she likes them, I guess that counts as perfection still, no matter how painful it is to see.

In other news, BBQ sauce is rapidly ascending the list of top condiments. Not that there's really a lot of competition considering that I don't really use any other condiments not named ketchup. But BBQ sauce is clearly better than ketchup since they both have tomato bases (sort of), but BBQ sauce takes things in a much more awesome direction.

I wasn't really very focused while I was writing this, so let's sum things up real quick at the end. Multiple kinds of cheese are better than just one, it's nice when the grill does what it's supposed to, and BBQ sauce is delicious. Write that down.

-Jon

Hopefully This Won't Jinx Things

After 2010 ended with a whimper, it looks like 2011 might be off to a stronger start. Only time (and my ability to drag the people I'm eating with to burger places) will tell if it can continue.

To conclude birthday week, we went out to Judie's to celebrate the 23rd anniversary of Matt and Bill's invasion of the world. And even though I had just had a cheeseburger for dinner last night, I still felt the urge to order another one. I decided on the gorgonzola and mushroom burger, which came with 2 kinds of mushrooms (I believe shiitake and portobello) and was an absolute monster. Check it out!

Holy moly! It doesn't look like it's a massive burger, but it felt like I was easily eating twice as much. It was very meaty, and the gorgonzola was piled on. It was delicious, although I probably could have gotten away with only eating half of it and been more than satisfied. Oh well, maybe now that birthday week is over, I'll stop gorging myself like a pug. It will be tough if I keep getting burgers of this quality, and such tasty fries.

Matt ordered the four-cheese garlic bread, which as awesome, and I also tried a new beer, which I'm sure you'd like to hear all about. So you can go read that if you haven't already. All around, a delightful meal.

-Jon

The Burger Before the Storm

Since there's already a ton of snow outside and we're projected to get more tonight, tonight might end up being the only chance at getting a grill out of the garage. Which is precisely what Dad did tonight.

Assuming we get anything close to the snow they're expecting overnight, today might have been the only full school day of the week. And of course I worked it, because I am terrible at being unemployed properly. Who would have thought it would be so tough. After that, it was time to finish birthday shopping (hey, if my brothers wanted their gift on their actual birthday, maybe they should have been born in a month without 2+ feet of snow), then continue to feed my addiction to launching birds at towers of pigs. Stupid pigs. Stop being so smug!

Today was also the day we learned that Dad's grill is now one of those temperamental grills that decides to cook different parts of the grill at different temperatures. Like mine! Four burgers went on and came off at the same time, and they ended up as one rare, one mostly rare, one 2/3 medium-rare and 1/3 medium (which was mine), and, unfortunately for Dad, one pretty well done. Come on grill, that ain't right.

We also had some sauteed mushrooms and onions, which were delightful. And also the standard Ruffles with jalapeño cheese dip. And a pickle! All around a delicious meal.

-Jon

Burgers Were the Bright Spot

Today started off ok, except that a certain pair of pugs wanted to get up earlier than I did. I was going to be subbing for a half day, and it was the second half, which meant I didn't have to get up at 6. Then I had a productive morning. I did some laundry, washed some dishes, neatened up my Pau Gasol-esque neckbeard, ate a breakfast sandwich and bacon. . . things were looking up. And then I went outside, and found yet another flat tire. How is this even possible!?

But luckily, dinner ended up being a cheeseburger and waffle fries. On a sidenote, what's the deal with waffle fries? How are they like a waffle? Waffles don't have holes in them, and waffle fries do. Case closed. Time to rename those bad boys. Since I did most of the work of coming up with the difficult idea to change the name, you're responsible for the easy part of deciding on what that name will be. I'll be expecting it by 2011. Thanks.

Back to the burger. Nice and rare, American cheese, lettuce and tomato. And barbecue sauce! Yeah, I threw a curveball in there today. And it was a pretty delicious one. If you've never substituted BBQ sauce for ketchup, give it a try sometime. It may rock your world.

Now I'm off to set up a webcam since someone is obviously sabotaging my precious automobile.

-Jon

Another Burger Already

It looks like November is also off to a fast start for burgers. We'll see if it lasts.

After burgers for dinner last night, there was a rapid turnaround resulting in more burgers tonight! This time they were at Dad and Kelly's house, and there were different burger decorations. We had lettuce, tomato and sautéed onions for them. Sadly, I don't have any interesting stories or pictures to add, so this post is quickly heading for its conclusion.

The burgers were good, but they were overcooked by Dad's standards. It wasn't really a big deal though, because they were still juicy. And they were gigantic, which made them look silly on a small bun. Bill somehow managed to eat all of one piece of the bun before he had finished his burger, which I just don't understand. It's a mystery!

-Jon

Twins!

After such a promising start, it ended up that October had the fewest burgers consumed of all the months so far this year. It also looks like I'm going to be eating fewer burgers this year than last year. Does that mean this trend will continue until I don't eat any burgers and then start eating negative burgers? Only time will tell. I certainly hope not, as those negative burgers sound scary.

Chuck wanted to grill up some burgers, so that sounded like a delightful plan to me. I added my extensive talents to the mix and chopped up a couple onions and tomatoes while he sautéed some mushrooms and got bacon in the microwave. The end result was this:

It's like a burger and its clone! I tried out my developing theory that putting all the toppings underneath the burger makes the whole thing easier to eat, so there are 3 slices of bacon at the bottom, with tomato slices, onions and mushrooms on top of that base. I think that I had fewer escaped toppings with this method, so more research is going to be needed for confirmation. Also, I need to account for variables such as burger juiciness and bun type. I guess I'm going to have to eat a lot more burgers in the future.

Oh, and they came out delicious.

-Jon

Home Cooking Is the Solution

The solution to what? To not having the cheese left off your burger. Because that is truly an almost unforgivable offense. Sort of like being a Jets fan.

It was burger night over at Mom and Chuck's, and they were burgers hand-made out of ground beef. That's generally going to give you the best burger, although I think they need to be seasoned a little more before they hit the grill. I put a little bit of garlic salt on them, but it wasn't quite enough. I'll be tweaking my seasoning attempts whenever people aren't paying attention over there, which is frequently.

The burgers came out nicely, with a lovely pink hue. And, far more importantly, mine had cheese on it! And also onions and tomatoes. But the main focus is the cheese. This blog could have been more appropriately titled Mmmm, cheeseburgers, but that was too long. We also had tater tots like it was middle school, fries, salad and zucchini. One of those things definitely does not fit in with the rest of the meal.

For the humourous part of this story, Odin had to spend the meal outside on the deck being sad because he doesn't know how to behave himself around Patches. He's like Jojo the Indian circus boy with a pretty new pet. And Chloe spent part of it sitting on the single step up into the kitchen, and crying because apparently it was too high for her to climb down. Pugs: nature's joke.

-Jon